Top critical review
Doesn't Hit the Mark
September 25, 2018
On the whole, it's just okay. It's a science fiction book set in the bay area, and the descriptions of the not-too-distant future are great. I really liked the beginning and I was instantly drawn in to the story and the danger. The "keepers" are a nice addition to the sci-fi elements. And the gas masks needed because of the air quality is also a nice touch, however I can't imagine anyone doing physical exercise outside in that environment. Instead of jogging outside, I would think people would use an inside treadmill, right?
As a whole, the story didn't work for me, mostly because the science was so sketchy. Much of it didn't make sense, and there weren't enough details for me to form a clear idea of the desalination machine and process.
Also, the two main characters Jess and Matteo weren't dimensional--especially Matteo, and some of the minor characters were just confusing. I first pictured Beck as a big businessman type who hires people to do the jobs he needs done, including his dirty work. Later, with all the "dude" this and dude that, he seemed liked a young punk-ish mobster, and he was going to do his own foul deeds.
At the beginning I thought David was a handsome charismatic and intelligent colleague--boss, actually, and it made sense that Jess would be attracted to him.
Later his true character is revealed, but in an unreal Jeckyll/Hyde way. I'm still not sure who beat him up--POP in Desal coats??? He and Jess were going to be killed after they signed the purchase agreement to give their invention to (? still not sure) and I'm wondering how that would happen. There seems to be no law and order, no forces of good to triumph over all this evil.
Two important women characters also seemed to morph into sleazy different people. It just felt like everyone was out to get Jess and Matteo who were totally clueless as to why, and totally on their own. No one to help them along.
I did read it to the end, and after the first chapters, I kept hoping I would have some aha moments--some of those 'so that's why that happened', but I rarely did.
Oh, and one more thing. The author should invest in a good editing. Silly grammatical mistakes and odd sentence structure threw me off too many times. Irritating.